Please be advised that by selecting any of the following services—Discernment Counseling, Guided Separation Counseling, and Divorce Mediation—you are not participating in therapy or receiving therapeutic interventions.
What Is Premarital Counseling?
Premarital counseling is a type of relational work that helps partners have a healthier marriage before it begins by setting realistic expectations, improving their communication, and working on conflict resolution. It addresses issues such as finances, intimacy, family of origin, strengths and issues, beliefs, and values. These conversations prepare partners for when problems emerge down the road.
Reasons to Attend Premarital Counseling:
Couples Therapy or Counseling is a type of relational work where couples typically see a licensed therapist or counselor for weekly sessions. A therapist facilitates the couple as they voice their issues and concerns, and provides feedback based on witnessing the couple’s interactions and assessing the complexities of the couple's issues, as well as the individual and extrafamilial issues that impact the couple's issues. A therapist offers insight, techniques, guidance, and advice for how the couple can resolve relationship distress and improve their inter- and intra-relational dynamics.
Engaging in couples therapy will help in understanding the root causes of conflict through higher consciousness and mindful learning and practicing important techniques, such as empathy building, increasing awareness of patterns within their disagreements, improving self-awareness by exploring their past, and identifying and verbalizing emotions at the heart of the couple's conflicts. These are all elements that help couples begin to navigate and improve their relationship from its core. In some cases, couples might also engage in family therapy or individual therapy in addition to couples therapy.
Note: Therapy and counseling are often used interchangeably, but they have specific differences as well as overlaps, depending on the context and the specific practices of professionals. The key distinction lies in the depth and scope of training, experience, practice, and credentials of the professionals, the services provided, and the specific needs of the individuals seeking help.
Here's a general overview:
Counseling:
Therapy:
Discernment counseling is a form of counseling for couples who believe they are on the brink of a divorce and need guidance on whether or not to end the marriage.
Most instances involve couples with “mixed agendas,” in which one partner is leaning towards divorce and the other wants to remain married. Discernment counseling is usually conducted by licensed marriage and family therapists (MFTs) who specialize in marriage and divorce. It involves a process of extensively evaluating the marriage and in-depth discussions as to why divorce is now being considered.
Counselors act as mediators offering unbiased objective feedback to partners with opposing viewpoints on the relationship. The counselor aids the couple in deciphering whether divorce is the best option for their marriage, or whether participating in 6 months of marriage counseling is an option on the table before reassessing how the couple will choose to move forward with their relationship. At that point, the options are usually to either end the relationship, stay in the relationship, or extend the counseling process for an additional specified period of time before reevaluation.
Guided Separation Counseling is a specialized form of therapy designed to support couples who are considering separation, either temporarily for the purpose of respite, or in preparation for a more permanent separation arrangement. It aims to provide a structured and safe environment for couples to explore their options, emotions, and concerns related to their relationship.
Here are some key points about Guided Separation Counseling (GSC):
Purpose: To help couples navigate the challenging process of separation in a constructive and healthy manner, promoting effective communication, understanding, and decision-making.
Collaborative Approach: Involves the active participation of both partners, with the guidance of a trained therapist. The therapist acts as a neutral facilitator, helping the couple to express their needs, concerns, and feelings while maintaining a respectful and productive dialogue.
Emotional Support: provides a supportive space for individuals to express their emotions, process their grief, and work toward healing.
Exploration of Options: Sessions allow couples to explore various options and alternatives to separation. This may involve discussing potential ways to reconcile, seeking clarification about their goals and expectations, or exploring the possibility of a trial separation before making a final decision.
Co-Parenting Considerations: If the couple has children, GSC places a significant emphasis on discussing a child-focused co-parenting plan that addresses the needs and best interests of the children.
Conflict Resolution: Conflict is common during the separation process. GSC equips couples with effective conflict-resolution skills, enabling them to navigate disagreements and make decisions collaboratively while dealing with their own emotional struggles.
Closure and Transition: Where permanent separation is inevitable, GSC assists couples in finding closure and transitioning amicably into the next phase of their lives (achieved through divorce mediation and post-divorce counseling).
It's important to note that GSC is not intended to persuade couples to stay together or separate. Instead, it provides a supportive and structured environment for couples to explore their options, emotions, and concerns, ultimately helping them make informed decisions about their future.
What is Divorce Mediation (DM)?
Divorce Mediation is a type of alternative dispute resolution process where a neutral mediator helps couples navigate their divorce settlement without going to court. The stages of divorce mediation typically include an initial consultation, joint sessions to discuss and negotiate terms, and the finalization of a written agreement.
How does the DM process work?
Both spouses meet, either jointly or separately, with a trained mediator who facilitates discussions and negotiations. The mediator helps identify and address the key issues, such as child custody, division of assets, and spousal support. The process is focused on finding mutually acceptable solutions and reaching a fair settlement.
What is the purpose of DM?
The purpose of DM is to provide a non-adversarial alternative to litigation. It allows couples to maintain control over the outcome of their divorce, reduce conflict, save time and money, and unnecessary added distress to an already challenging transition. DM promotes and advocates for children's best interests.
What are the disadvantages of divorce mediation?
While divorce mediation offers many benefits, there are a few potential disadvantages. It may not be suitable for cases involving domestic abuse or extreme power imbalances. Additionally, if one or both parties are unwilling to compromise or openly communicate, mediation may not be successful. In such cases, litigation may be necessary.
FAQs about divorce mediation
Q: How long does divorce mediation typically take?
A: The duration of divorce mediation varies depending on the complexity of the issues and the parties' willingness to reach an agreement. It can take anywhere from a few weeks to several months.
Q: Does divorce mediation guarantee a settlement?
A: While mediation aims to facilitate a settlement, there is no guarantee. However, statistics show that the majority of couples who participate in mediation are able to reach an agreement.
Q: Is divorce mediation legally binding?
A: Once the parties reach an agreement, it is typically drafted into a legally binding document that can be submitted to the court for approval and incorporation into the final divorce decree.
Divorce can have a significant impact on an individual, and the severity of the impact varies from person to person and can be highly distressing. The severity of the impact during the divorce process can depend on various factors, including the length of the marriage, the reasons for the divorce, the presence of children, the level of conflict, and the support network available. Divorce can lead to a range of emotional responses such as sadness, anger, grief, anxiety, and even depression.
For some individuals, divorce can be a deeply distressing and traumatic experience and elicits trauma responses that affect various aspects of their lives, including their mental and physical well-being, relationships, and overall sense of self. It may take time for individuals to heal and adjust to the changes that divorce brings.
Signs You Need Divorce Counseling:
Divorce Counseling for Parents- Supporting Your Children through Separation
Divorce counseling for parents focuses on providing support and guidance in navigating the challenges of co-parenting and supporting children through the separation process. It helps parents prioritize the well-being of their children and develop strategies to minimize the negative impact of divorce on them.
Some common areas of focus in divorce counseling for parents include:
Post-divorce closure counseling is a type of counseling or therapy that focuses on helping individuals navigate the emotional and psychological challenges that arise after a divorce. It aims to provide support, guidance, and tools to facilitate healing, self-reflection, and personal growth following the end of a marriage.
In post-divorce closure counseling, a trained therapist or counselor works with individuals to address the emotional aftermath of divorce, such as grief, anger, sadness, guilt, and confusion. The counselor helps clients process their feelings, explore their experiences, and gain insight into the factors that contributed to the end of the relationship.
The focus of post-divorce closure counseling may include:
Post-divorce closure counseling can vary in duration and approach, depending on the needs and goals of the individual seeking support. It is important to seek a qualified therapist or counselor experienced in divorce-related issues to ensure appropriate guidance and support during the healing process.
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